3 Months Old - First Snow

So today - December 20th we celebrate Caroline's 3 month birthday - she is officially 13 weeks old today and we're just on the cusp of smiling. Ironically, it is also her first official snow. When we woke this morning at 3:30 am it was not yet snowing, but by 4:15 as Caroline was settling back into her slumber, the ground was a fresh white blanket. I sang her Silent Night as we watched it fall and she slipped back into dreamland. These are the times early morning doesn't seem so early.

Almost Smiling...

Uncle Jimmy Update

Many of you continue to ask about Uncle Jimmy and his status since his massive stroke in July. I have not been good about providing updates, perhaps because he was making such positive progress. As of late, this has changed. Just a few weeks ago Patrick and Georgia made a flying trip to SD, primarily to visit Uncle Jim and they had a great visit. Patrick was impressed with Jim's progress and spirits and came home encouraged. He had a few minor items of concern, but a plan was put in place to address these.

Then last week, Patrick learned that they were planning to end all of his therapies by the end of this week due to lack of progress. Healthcare reimbursement requests ongoing improvement and unfortunately, the therapists didn't feel that Jim was making significant enough improvement to continue. This was disappointing, but we were checking into additional private pay options.

Then last Friday Jim suffered a mild heart attack and is now hospitalized in Scotland with a combination of complications. His minor bed sores are still not healing or responding to medications, his kidneys are growing weaker and he is pretty nauseated off and on throughout the day. He now has a staff infection and most likely his diabetes and weaker respiratory system are making healing slower and more difficult.

His spirits also appear down, which is a change for him. I hope you'll keep him in your prayers today and throughout this holiday season. Although he could be transported for more aggressive treatment, the decision has been made to keep him comfortable and in familiar surroundings in Scotland. He is fighting a hard fight and we continue to pray for comfort and no pain for him.

In the midst of the holiday bustle and all of the blessings we have each received it is easy to forget about those who have not been as fortunate this past year. For you, Uncle Jim, we lift up prayers, we love you.

Great Grandma's Connection

I cannot believe I forgot to mention the connection between great grandma and Caroline, other than the obvious - Grandma Gert was born at only 3 pounds more than 85 years ago! An amazing story, an amazing woman and an amazing connection to her great granddaughter. We can only pray that Caroline turns out as healthy! When we reflect on all the medical care that Caroline has already received, it seems like an even bigger miracle that Grandma is here today. Today, I am thankful for her and the wonderful introduction she had to Caroline.

More Visitor Photos

Aunt Liz has the special touch again...

Combined effort

Grandpa's first glimpse at Caroline

Great Grandma jumped into action and Caroline enjoyed all of the attention.

She's got the magic touch

Thanksgiving and Georgia Turns 3!

It's been way too long since I've provided an update and since I'm returning to work this Friday I figured I better try to squeeze something in. We've had lots of excitement from Thanksgiving to Georgia's endless celebrations turning 3! She has definitely enjoyed celebrating and singing!

Thanksgiving was wonderful - from the perfect weather to our family coming together in Kansas City we had a great time. It was the first time great grandma, grandpa Larry and the Lindner's met Caroline and we enjoyed introducing them. Although looking back, it was a crazy time of lost sleep for mom and Caroline (we had unknowingly switched her reflux medication to something that contained lactose, I mean seriously), we're still hoping we didn't keep great grandma and grandpa Larry up.

Dad, Uncle Josh and Jack ran the Pilgrim Run on Thanksgiving Morning...

Aunt Liz and Caroline on Thanksgiving

And then we had a birthday celebration for Georgia at Monkey Bizness with "lots of people" per her request:) She had a great time and I'll try to upload a few more pics of her on the rock wall. We then headed to Buca's for a "fancy" dinner on the plaza on Saturday night and sang to both Georgia and Betsy for their 3rd birthdays - what fun! 

Just the week before we had taken Georgia to the doctor, down on the plaza and on the way there, she asked if we were headed to Baby Sister's House? I am thankful she must have gotten my good internal sense of direction and will soon be directing her dad on the most efficient route everywhere. She definitely recognized that we were close to the hospital and remembered all of the trips down to visit sister - perhaps she doesn't think baby sister is staying forever at our house? 

Hanging with her school friends at Monkey Bizness

Georgia enjoyed time with Betsy and Luci!

Georgia, Betsy and Luci blowing out the birthday candles...

We also survived our 2 month immunizations and 3 year old check-up last week. Only baby sister needed shots and Georgia was ok with that. She enjoyed an over sized "ring-pop" from the pharmacy on the way home since she was such a good big helper.

We are anxiously awaiting the arrival of Christmas - we have a new elf, named Roscoe at our house who is watching and reporting all of our daily activities and wish lists. It has been lots of fun to see where he returns to every morning. The elf arrived after Georgia and dad made a trip to South Dakota last weekend to visit Grandma Barb, Uncle Jimmy, Great Grandma Adeline and her cousins in Sioux Falls. It was a flying fast trip, and Georgia was a good traveling companion for dad. After she met the elf at her cousin's house, Santa sent one to our house and she is loving the anticipation of the coming holiday. Top on her list is helping to blow out the candles on Jesus' birthday cake and a purple princess bike (she is 3)!

Since we will not be traveling this year for Christmas, we are looking forward to a full holiday of firsts. Our first time at home, our first visit from Santa at home, our first baking of birthday cake for Jesus, the list goes on and on and Georgia is keeping track of it all. Just the other evening, she pulled her small rocking chair up to the Christmas tree in the living room just before bedtime and started rocking. She took in the ornaments and lights and told us how much she was looking forward to Christmas. I wish that I had snuck in a photo, it was so sweet. The rocking chair was grandpa Donnie's growing up and it was fun to see her enjoy it in such a big girl way. We haven't seen the black kitty in a while, but somehow it felt like he was close to us that night. (Many of you know that I believe Patrick's dad, grandpa Donnie often checks on us during monumental moments and typically comes as a black cat - primarily because Patrick was so superstitious and Donnie had such a good sense of humor.)

As we celebrate the 2nd week in advent and prepare to light the last 2 candles on the advent wreath, we continue to send up prayers of gratitude for all that we have been blessed with these past few months. Although the lack of sleep has been challenging, I wouldn't trade it for the world. As Caroline grows and continues to look more and more like her sister, we have a constant reminder of how lucky we are. We are grateful for our family and friends, our good health, our small miracle child, all the doctors and nurses and the time we're sharing together as a family.

We may not get a holiday card out this year and we might not get to do a lot of things together as a family until Caroline gets older, but the big, important stuff is just around the corner. We look forward to celebrating the most important birthday of the year with our new 3 year old in just a few weeks - Jesus' birthday. Complete with rainbow birthday cake - per Georgia's request - she says she knows it's his favorite!

Preemie Diaper Graduate

Exciting News ---

This week Caroline officially graduated out of preemie diapers! And for the first time is wearing newborn swaddlers - we think she's enjoying the change given the fact that the newborn size is made of slightly different material that wicks the wetness away. Ahhh - the joys of diapers.

We've had some challenging sleep patterns, as many of you know, but we may be on the right path now thanks to a new swing and fabulous sling! Just 2 short weeks and I have to return to work, so this is promising for mom and Caroline! I will post a photo soon of the measures a sleepless mother will go to, to keep her angel sleeping:)

Next week Caroline will receive all of her 2 month immunizations - I've put it off as long as possible, in hopes that her little legs would get a little chubbier. And in fact, she got real legs just last week - with actual rolls and everything. (I know some of you do not believe that this is possible at just 6 pounds, but trust me, they're there.)

Our hungry angel is calling - so I must sign off. Thank you to everyone for all of your ongoing support - I've forgotten how demanding a little one can be at times. And congratulations to our many friends who have welcomed new little ones over the past couple of weeks - lots of new beautiful babies in the world!

2 Months or 2 Weeks?

Today Caroline is officially 2 weeks old based on her due date and 2 months old tomorrow based on her arrival. So, according to the doctors at our NICU follow-up appointment last week, we still have a few months of sleepless nights ahead of us. We celebrated leaving our heart monitor behind at our appointment and the steady weight gain she has had since transitioning home. She is just below the 3rd percentile, so lots of room for improvement but she's making progress.

Today, we celebrated our last home health visit with nurse Lisa. Although we enjoyed seeing her a few times a week, mom is thrilled to have open mornings and less pressure to be sure we're ready on time. 

Over the weekend we also finalized our nannies for when I return to work in just a few weeks. Hard to believe my 12 weeks is up so soon - our time together has gone soooooo quickly, but we're making the most of each day and praying for a few hours of sleep each night.

Big sister has been celebrating friend birthdays for the past few weekends and when you're three everything is about being a princess. Check out the hair and outfits - gotta love girls!

Mom's vanity - aka - princess hair station

Georgia continues to be a great big sister - helping out on all diaper changes and feedings. There is also great fascination with why she can't have milk for her sister - so I can imagine the hysterical conversations at daycare! We can hardly wait for them to grow up together and see how their personalities emerge.

Momma in the making...

Notice the face painting from one of the parties

Caroline has gained lots of weight over the past couple of weeks and proudly displayed 5 pounds, 14 ounces today on her last home health visit. At 2 months old she still has lots of growing to do, but we're so encouraged with her progress. Here's to full tummies, less reflux and greater interest in sleep my dear angel. Happy 2 month birthday!

Drum Roll....

At more than 7 weeks old, Caroline is mastering growth. She wowed our home health nurse today, gaining an impressive 27g per day since Monday and quickly approaching 5 pounds! That's right - progress that we have not known until this week - 5 pounds by the weekend. Reflux is still causing discomfort and lots of hours awake, but she's keeping the calories down. We can hardly wait to see what plans Caroline has for our big, bright world - it's true she's a fighter already. Georgia has her work cut out for herself - maintaining her large and in-charge personality.

We're closing in on care for Caroline when I return to work in just 5 short weeks. And Patrick returns to work on Monday, following 2+ weeks of paternity leave. Time is flying by, and leaves and temps are quickly falling as our hearts grow larger everyday. Constant reminders that we're on a journey and each day is to be cherished and treasured. May we continue to appreciate all the blessings of our lives and live with a spirit of gratitude for all we have been given. 

Making Progress

On this Super Tuesday, we are celebrating Caroline's progress and fact that we have already known her for nearly 7 weeks. She was due to arrive just yesterday and weighed in at our home health visit at 4 pounds, 11 ounces. This is great progress from last week and for that we are grateful.

She is still having a lot of discomfort from her reflux, but the medicine has diminished the constant vomiting, and is contributing to her weight gain this week. Hopefully we can continue to evaluate her meds and get her onto something that will eliminate a bit more of her pain with feedings.

We just got a few of the photos that were taken on the day we were released from the hospital, 6 ounces ago:) and wanted to share. They are not the best but many are asking how big she is getting. We are grateful for her progress and look forward to seeing her chubby cheeks grow. We continue home health visits for the next couple of weeks and return to Saint Luke's for NICU and pediatrician appointments over the next couple of weeks.

Big sister, Georgia is also making great progress. We attended her fall parent conference this morning and Ms. Abbey had great things to say - always a proud parent moment - not that we can take any credit, but sure feels good to try.

Georgia also attended her first friend birthday party on Sunday afternoon. A princess party no less and had a great time, enjoying brightly frosted cake, a real princess entertainer and her first face painting. She fell fast asleep on our way home and was slow to agree to removing the glitter rainbow on her cheek. I'm not sure where the time goes, but it seems impossible that she's already looking forward to her 3rd birthday!

And Patrick is enjoying his second week home with me and Caroline (maybe enjoying is a little optimistic). He is facing an office move on Friday of this week as his company continues to expand and outgrow their office space. 

It's fair to say there is still a lot going on - not sure where the time goes each day. Between home health, physician office visits, and ongoing feedings, the days fly by - but by any definition - Progress!

Missing Magic?

Almost 3 years ago our lives were changed forever when we met Georgia Claire for the first time. While still in the hospital she received a musical seahorse from my cousin, Emily, which quickly became known as the 'magical seahorse.' Even while still at Saint Luke's with the factory batteries, the seahorse began transforming our lives and providing 7 glorious, uninterrupted minutes of quiet. We even own the seahorse in multiple colors after leaving it behind at great grandma Gert's over Christmas one year.

So - after our 7th night (but hey, who's counting) home with sweet Caroline (it helps to always refer to her as sweet during posts like this...) the seahorse no longer appears to be magical. And raging reflux is continuously interrupting sweet Caroline's sleep. Despite new batteries and lots of coaxing, Georgia took the seahorse to bed with her last night. 

So as you have guessed our sweet Caroline is having a difficult time transitioning home and mom and dad are struggling to get a few zzzz's. We've started the crazy reflux medication journey and are waiting out the next few days until we can get something stronger. After losing weight over the weekend during her home health visit on Monday, we are back on the 24 calorie human milk fortifier (adding it to 2 bottles per day) and trying to encourage rest. As you might imagine, reflux is not helping to contribute to her weight gain or her happiness. Next weight check is Thursday and after being up for literally 13 hours straight yesterday, her chances of performing well are not looking good.

So, on her first Halloween we're praying for a special witches brew with lots of sleeping potions so sweet Caroline can continue to grow and stay with us at home:) After a jack-o-lantern pizza and a mini pumpkin carving party with grandma, we are ready for our trick-or-treaters!

For those of you who have not heard, Georgia is going as a purple butterfly and baby sister as a sweet black spider (although she'll primarily be home bound:)) More photos to come - 

Happy Haunting ---

South Dakota Visitors

Caroline was introduced to her South Dakota cousins and Grandma Barb this past weekend, after transitioning home. Georgia LOVED having her cousins in town and I think it's fair to say she's resting just a bit longer this afternoon. Hope you all enjoy some of the photos...

Cousin Hannah enjoyed holding Caroline

Georgia introduced her cousins to the geese she loves to feed at the park

Georgia loves Hailey

Caroline - stressed out?

Aunt Amy taught us a few things

Uncle Topher caught a couple snuggle minutes

NICU Graduate

So the nurses were right - no baby stays forever in the NICU and Caroline transitioned home late Wednesday, October 24. Her feeding tube was removed one week ago on the 21st and she quickly passed all of her final assessments and joined us at home. She is home on a monitor with strict orders to continue to thrive and gain weight:)

Our transition has been just that and Caroline definitely missed her quiet corner of the NICU her first couple of nights home, but we're trying convince her home is best:) Georgia is enjoying having her home and has been a wonderful big sister - assisting with all tasks and promptly reporting when Caroline is crying.

We had family from South Dakota visit over the weekend and I'll post photos very soon of Grandma Barb, Aunt Amy, Uncle Topher and Caroline's cousins. Georgia had a wonderful time catching up with Hannah, Hailey, Hady and Hudson and wished the weekend hadn't gone so quickly. 

A big thank you to everyone who continues to pray for our family and deliver support in so many wonderful ways - we are so lucky to have such wonderful family and friends. It seems as though the phone calls, meals, prayers and words of encouragement always come when we need them most - thank you. We are praying that God continues to bless each of your lives the way you have blessed ours.

With Grateful Hearts and Tired Eyes - 
Patrick, Jen, Georgia and Caroline

At home with Dad - eyes wide open

Just a few days before discharge...

Tootsies

Day 26...

Caroline continues to do very well in the NICU - she is focused on feeding and growing. She is still has her feeding tube and monitors but otherwise is wire free. She's maintaining her body temperature in the crib and just has to put on weight and learn to take all of her feedings on her own. We are focused on completing her car seat test and going to through monitor training this week while she puts on weight and continues to grow. Everyone is expecting that she will come home on a monitor for approximately one month - the monitors alarm anytime she has an 'event' where she stops breathing. Almost since the beginning, Caroline has been resolving all her events on her own - meaning - although she is forgetting to breath, she does figure out on her own without additional stimulation to start breathing again. This is again good news for her.

She is in the bad habit of pulling out her feeding tube on a daily basis, so we took the opportunity to snap her photo with one of her biggest fans in the NICU yesterday. Nurse Lori has been rooting Caroline on since day one and Caroline totally responds to her voice - she also LOVES Halloween and entertains us with a million new outfits!

I have also been meaning to post a photo of my daily drive to and from the plaza. The canopy of color along Ward Parkway is amazing - it just makes me smile each day. When Caroline arrived the trees were not even changing color yet and now today - they are just beyond their peak and will soon be thinning out. After mentioning the trees almost daily, Patrick and GA snapped this photo for me on their way home the other night. Although it doesn't do the color justice, you get the idea.

And a few more shots of mom and dad enjoying snuggle time with Caroline. She is starting to really change with the extra weight she's putting on - her cheeks are filling out, her eyes are changing, her ears have grown and she is working hard to grow into her head:) She is holding steady at 3 pounds, 12 ounces today.

Perfect Reflection

So, grandma comes through with another perfect reflection this morning - that is most appropriate to share. I hope you all enjoy it - Lord knows it's the words I need to hear and reflect on every single day. Each day I pray for patience as Caroline works so hard to gain weight and learn how to live in our great, big world. As her doctors remind me each day - patience is typically on short order in the NICU and so every little bit we can find is a blessing.

Caroline continues to do well and began nursing 1 - 2 times a day on Saturday. This is a BIG success and we're all excited as this gets her one step closer to coming home. She is back to daily 'events', where she stops breathing, but she continues to self-resolve during these, so that is great news. We are looking forward to welcoming our miracle home in the next couple of weeks.

The devotional below is by Jimmy Pena, one of the founders of PrayFit. Like many truths, it bears repeating again and again. 

Sovereign Lord, You can handle anything that comes our way. You are made strong in our weakness. We don’t need to hang on to our baggage We have something better – Your eternal love. May we learn to give You our baggage and accept Your peace in return. Amen.

Our Baggage Handler

“Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.” –Matthew 6:34

We sure do like our baggage. Ever notice the reluctancy of airline passengers to part with their carry-ons? My chocolate lab Josey is more likely to give up a fresh T-bone. When it comes to personal property, we growl “mine”, no matter how short the flight. Separate us from what’s “rightfully” ours and somehow the sky is falling (even at 30,000 feet, which is where this entry was written).

When you think about it, the purpose of the flight is not the flight, but a safe landing. The pilot doesn’t need anything we lug on board to get us where we need to go. (You know where I’m going with this.)

If you’re like me, you’d be better off to check some of life’s luggage. Worry weighs us down and fear fogs our vision; good thing God doesn’t need a co-pilot. In fact, I think I’ll take my plastic pilot wings back to my seat. We still have a ways to go.

–Jimmy Peña

Kisses for Caroline

Kisses for Caroline - XOXOXOXOXO

Family Time

Georgia held Caroline for the first time this morning - she was a Great Big Sister! Caroline has also had several other visitors over the past couple of days - and she can get out and about since she's free from the lights and isolate. Happy stay at home days everyone! 

Aunt Kate and Caroline on her last day in the isolate

Cousin Emily and Caroline

Aunt Bonnie and Caroline

2 Weeks Old and Counting

Sweet Caroline was 2 weeks old yesterday - hard to believe that we've already known her for 14 days! I'm not sure where the time goes. She continues to grow and do well. This week has been a big week as she graduated to an open crib and now has to work hard to maintain her body temperature and she lost her billi lights, so we can hold her more often. In addition, she has moved to a new NICU and has a very quiet corner to herself, both mom and Caroline are enjoying this change.

Our primary focus is now on eating and gaining weight. She is still on a monitor and has her feeding tube, but other than that is device free and she hasn't had an 'event' in more than 24 hours. Feeding and nursing continue to be exhaustive tasks for her, but as she continues to grow stronger, we're hoping she'll figure this out. Mom took infant CPR again this week and dad is next in line - we also were trained in infant massage and Caroline is enjoying that each day.

With all of the poking and prodding that occurs each day for her and the fact that she has super sensitive skin, massage is a new, gentle type of touch for her hands and feet. Dad was a rockstar and Caroline loved it! She now weighs in just under 3 1/2 pounds and is wearing clothes! She definitely looks a lot bigger. She welcomes visitors almost everyday - she is popular. 

Most likely, a few more weeks and she'll be transitioning home after she puts on a bit more weight and learns how to eat. She is just 35 weeks gestation this week, and size wise a bit further behind - but doing exceptionally well. Mom is back to driving, so coordinating visits is much easier - although I did have some wonderful drivers:) Thank you to everyone who helped me out and carted me back and forth to the hospital.

Georgia continues to adjust and is anxious for Caroline (her baby), to actually be at home. We'll see how long that lasts:) She is your typical 2, almost 3 year old, and giving her dad a run for his money. I will try to post some new photos soon - trying to coordinate our camera, cords, phones, email accounts and connectivity is proving to be a challenge for mom:) 

Happy Friday - the time is flying by so quickly. We continue to be stuffed to the gills with wonderful meals and unexpected visitors - thank you to everyone for your ongoing support and concern. We know that we are so blessed and our family is well prayed for - we only hope that we can return all of this generosity and support to each of you. Godspeed...

Spoiled Rotten

That's us these days - spoiled rotten by friends, neighbors and family. Everyone has been so generous and our front porch is seeing lots of activities (good thing Grandma got us decorated with a few pumpkins and mums). Georgia now makes it a point to check the front step - not sure how we'll transition from this:) Oh, the trials of generosity!

A giant thank you and shout out to everyone who continues to pray for our family and Caroline's growth. She has now surpassed her birth weight and is thinking about transitioning to an open air crib. WOW! I think mom is most nervous about this - but excited to see her continuing to do so well.

Georgia also says thank you for all of the fun big sister gifts that have come her way - she is really embracing her big sister role and is excited for the day when Caroline gets to come home. She is even sharing some of hospital visit stories with her friends at school.

May the blessings that have touched our lives be returned to each of you ten-fold. We are blessed and we are grateful for our growing family, our strong support network and each of you who continue to send warm thoughts and prayers our way. We hope that one day we can return half of what we have been given. Life seems to be getting busier and busier and so I hope you'll forgive the multiple days that go without updates and know that no news is good news and we're focused on growing and feeding and wearing big girl clothes!

"The child grew and became strong, filled with wisdom; 

and the favor of God was upon her." Luke 3:40